OK maybe that’s going a bit overboard with the metaphor but you get the point.

In a recent discussion, someone told me that two teachers in a relationship with each other weren’t necessarily a good match because they were always “telling each other what/how to do___”…because that is how teachers teach.

The simple fact that it DID upset me spoke volumes.

As I thought about it I realized that the best teachers guide their students on a journey of self-discovery. They understand their subject and students so well that they can formulate questions to encourage them to find their own answers. While there are times that some details may be necessary to provide a foundation…that foundation is best laid when the subject is eager for knowledge.

Those teachers that feel pressed to deliver, unqualified or limited in their scope of knowledge may resort to an answer that includes some form of “that’s the way it is”.

Or there is the parental fall back of – “here let me do it for you”, because it’s faster and simpler in our push button world.

I’ve done both in my time. And I can recall the frustration…and guilt, when as a young parent or teacher – I would say or do these things because I felt a lack of choices.

Most often it would be with something that either came naturally to me and I didn’t know how I knew something or some time when I had neglected to plan my time well and everyone paid for my shortsightedness.

On the other hand, I’ve worked as a vocal and speech coach with adults who struggle with presenting themselves, speaking up or performing and seen the results when a well meaning but unskilled music teacher (stuck with being a choir teacher in addition to their regular classroom duties) or parent who told the child to “just mouth it” or “we just need you to sing more softly —- all the time” and that child grew up believing they “couldn’t or shouldn’t” sing or speak out.

I have been fortunate to be surrounded by people who loved what they did, my parents who read to me or let me listen for hours on end to talking books. Music teachers within and without my family who loved to sing as well as teach. I even remember in college when I solidified my love for history. There is little doubt that it was tied to my Western Civ Professor who, for 12 weeks, one short semester, spoke of places and times past from a personal relationship. She had traveled all over Europe and her eyes would light up when she talked about the Parthenon or the Coliseum. It’s been over 30 years and while I admit I don’t remember her name, I remember her passion and love of the subject.

I believe it is the same thing with children. When we share our love of reading, music, math, science, nature…whatever the subject NOT because we want them to love it but just because it flows out of our own love for it – they will pick up on it. We’re not telling them they have to learn something – we’re sharing with them our own enthusiasm. There is no need to force them…because we really love what we’re doing.

So the next time you want to help someone learn a concept, skill or craft, if it becomes a struggle – take a moment and ask yourself these questions:

1. Do I love what I’m talking about?
2. Am I trying to “tell” them what to do?
3. Do I feel like I have enough tools in my tool bag that I can help them discover their own answers?
4. Am I unattached to their results?

If you answered no to any of these – consider asking for outside help. And let me know how it goes.

In the meantime, thank someone today that has inspired you, share a smile with someone you love and find something to laugh about it’ll keep you young at heart.

Love,
Kira

Let us start with the first concept that language is needed for communicating ideas. In The Inner Game, the concept of Self 1 and Self 2 are introduced as two different parts of our psyche. The first one is the “self” that has the ability to perform a given task at our peak potential.

The other is the “self” that keeps telling us, why we can’t, what we should have done, what we should be doing, what we did “wrong” – and the list goes on. Moreover, it is talking to us DURING the performance.

I was relieved when I read The Inner Game of Music because I have had that secondary dialogue running in my head for so many years that I thought it was normal! As I looked back I wondered how I could perform ANYTHING with that other voice telling me how I should have released that last phrase…sung that note…added more character…and so on.

After I read the book, I began to connect with my “best performances” and see how that “other voice” never came into the equation. The goal is to be so “in the moment” that nothing else exists but the NOW. As a performer, if I am totally in the present, the things that matter are the energy/message in the music and the interaction between the audience and me.

Barry Green also introduces the trio concept of Awareness, Will and Trust. This trio is like playing pixie sticks. The sum of the parts is greater than any individual element.

Awareness is being in touch with everything around me. This includes how I am feeling, what is happening in the “house” (which is what allows me to open up and interact with my audience), and what the music is saying. Awareness even allows me to improvise and deliver a message that someone may have needed to hear – that I did not know of ahead of time. 

Trust, also known as removing all reason for doubt, comes in the form of trusting my own skills and preparation. I will perform better if I am able to trust the rest of the ensemble (if this is a group), the adequacy of the venue, and even the sound system, This list of “trust” is as long as the different elements that you have in your performance…even dress or costuming can be a factor.

Will provides the focus or clarity. Do I know what my goals and objectives are for any given performance? My goal may be as simple as everyone having a good time…or it may be eliciting a certain response. The clarity alone may be enough that I will hit my mark simply by being present or it may require some additional preparation. However, unless I have thought through what my desire is – I will have chosen to open myself up to the possibility of missing my mark.

With the combination of Awareness, Will and Trust, I also put myself in a position to know when to ask for feedback or help. Without this combination, I may find myself having the “if only” dialogue, 5 minutes before curtain. This self-talk diminishes any performance…from theater to business. I can change the order if needed, because they work best simultaneously, but I would not experience the same success should I remove an element.

Until next time – remember, you have the choice to make it a GREAT DAY! The gratitude with which you greet the day may make all the difference so enjoy some laughter and have a wonderful one!

In Harmony,
Kira

Internet marketing of the “latest and greatest personal growth idea of the century” feels like it has gotten to that point. While there are many wonderful programs out there provide personal growth, self-actualization and empowerment with the best ones based on concepts thousands of years old, today’s marketing techniques make it sound like something new, forgotten, unheard of in centuries…you know what I mean. Moreover, it seems everyone is doing it from the great to the not so great. In addition, as I found some have deviated far from the boundaries of integrity.

Within Freedom’s Formula, I am always looking for ways to ask better questions, make better choices and embrace change that allows me to speak to more hearts. I hear from many of personal growth experts on a daily basis. I am open to tempering my thoughts and actions to be more in alignment with my understanding of truth as revealed to me – from whatever the source.

A few days ago, I received an email promoting the “Lost Art of Pelmanism”. It was from Joe Vitale. Now I have read Zero Limits and I liked his concepts, as we seem to agree on a number of points. I have even taken him up on a recommendation for health products. There is a “but” and it is a big one as far as I am concerned. He is not accessible. His email addresses bounce, you know, that reply email that is not valid. His communication is on a mass-market scale even to business associates. There is more too.

The information on Pelmanism did sound very interesting. Mental mastery, personal growth…you know the routine, so I followed the link to find out more about it. On the subsequent website there was a sentence caught my eye. It said, “These twelve books explain very clearly how to train your mind with exercises, concepts, and secrets that just aren’t available anywhere else.”

If this information was really around that long – how is it not “available anywhere else”?

So I decided to follow a different path.

I spent some time on Google looking up Pelmanism. I found a card “game” that is supposed to be based on the books. This is the same type of card game that I have played with my kids for years – turn cards over and match pairs by remembering where the different cards are located. I found a site that allows you to download all of the twelve books at no charge. Then I found the original author. Moreover, I found an antique bookstore about an hour away with all 12 books.

My initial intent was to do a comparison of content along with reviewing it from the perspective of Freedom’s Formula.

I went ahead and downloaded the PDF from Devox out of South Africa. It is riddled with errors – some obvious others not so. Up front, the reader is told of the potential for error with text saying, “Despite careful editing it is possible that some of the original contents is missing or spelled wrong.” Personally, having done extensive transcription of old news papers, “careful” editing does not allow for missing content or spelling errors as it can lead to different interpretation of content.

I bought the Lost Art of Pelmanism by Joe Vitale and Pat O’Bryan – it was a small investment to have the content in PDF format and to see how these two master markets and self-help gurus have used the information.

Both PDF versions include the routine “Copyright © 2005. All rights reserved. No portions of this work may be reproduced in any form…”

I also bought the 12 original books from Cromwell Books. For an anachronistic moment, I was thrilled to see that the original owner R. S. Rankin and the dates in book six 10/10/29, twelve 6/15/30. From the content of the books and brief reserch on the web – he could even have been Robert Stanely Rankin – professor professor of Political Science at Duke University. A Poly Sci Proffessor could very easily have used this information to great advantage. At least it makes for a very cool connection with history.

What surprised me upon first scanning, is that the content of the Lost Art of Pelmanism is little more than plagiarism. They appear to have simply changed the title and put their names on the books. Additionally, the layout is exactly the same, page breaks, hyphenation and all. Then you add a slick marketing page and voila, money in the bank. All for the little time it took to convert the text, put up a couple of web pages for sales and thank you/ product delivery then some emails to sell it all. Again and again since it started at least three years ago.

Joe Vitale and Pat O’Bryan do not seem to have even put anything new (of their own) in Mr. Ennerver’s work nor credit Mr. Ennever.

In any case, I am going to see how Pelmanism by William Joseph Ennever relates to Freedom’s Formula and the Handbook for Freedom. I will be keeping you posted at least once a week and we’ll see if it takes me as long to get through these as it did Mr. Rankin.

Until next time – go out and make it a great day!

In Harmony,

Kira

The single, most important moment in attracting new clients–your first 30 seconds, commonly known as “the Elevator Speech” or as we refer to it in GCN, your Audio Business Card (ABC).

While it’s about planting seeds and building business relationships, how do you know it’s working as well as it could? By what criteria do you use to evaluate it’s effectiveness? Like many entrepreneurs and small business owners it is usually based on what happens next. The reactive approach.

What about taking a more proactive approach? Answer these two simple questions;

• Have you ever recorded and listened to your ABC?
• Have you ever had anyone other than yourself review your ABC objectively?

If not, why would you expect someone else to listen, much less be intrigued or interested?

Promoting that intrigue or sparking that interest is what you are after initially. You network to build your business right? Most times, even if the product’s reputation precedes you, without intrigue and interest-building, your prospect is going to be mildly interested at best. And it still begs the question – why YOU? If they can get it somewhere else, what is going to make them come to you?

So how do you throw that 1-2 zippy punch that makes them come to attention?

Record yourself. Walk away from it for a short period, at least 15 minutes, and then listen to it. You may hear some things to change immediately. You may want to write it down. Then record it again.

However, the proof is in the pudding, as they say, so now you need to use it.

Consider starting with participating in one of our Virtual Meetings, currently free to those that choose to take advantage of the networking opportunity. Everyone who attends has the opportunity to record his or her ABC, listen to it and then, if they choose, re-record until they are satisfied. Then that ABC is presented to market your business during the online networking meeting for everyone to hear.

On the other hand, what if you want to improve it? You hear the quivering in your voice. Your words sound too similar to others in your profession. You can’t seem to find the zing that makes you stand out from the crowd. What do you do?

You get an expert to help you formulate it…to smooth, to excite, to express your expertise–to help you put YOUR passion into it!

Consider ramping it up by taking advantage of the Global Connections Networking Membership. We provide members up to two hours free coaching on their Audio Business Card – content and delivery per quarter so that you know you’re getting the maximum results possible.

• The team at GCN reviews the content from a sales and marketing perspective so your words will attract the referrals you desire.
• Once the content has a solid base, we help make sure that the delivery is smooth and confident.

Finally, and here’s the best part, once it is perfected, you don’t even have to be present to deliver it!

When you are ready AND if you choose, GCN posts your ABC on your GCN web page and provides YOU the audio file to put it on your own (separate) website if you prefer. Then, when someone has a referral to send you, they have the opportunity to hear you first so that when you do connect – it is a more qualified lead. They have heard your voice, your energy, your pitch and they liked what they heard.

Check it out. Join our next virtual meeting, or just jump to the chase and join Global Connections Networking and make your Audio Business Card a powerful marketing tool that will draw clients and new business to YOU!

To find out more about the creators of Global Connections Networking check out Kira Wagner at www.yourfreedomguide.com and Paul Wagner at www.softwaremagician.com