Gratitude Day 11 – Music

Today I am grateful for the music in my life and the people that I’m honored to share it with. Much like reading – music has always been an integral part of my existence. I actually can’t remember not singing.

Every Tuesday evening I have the honor of directing a great group of women and creating some beautiful music. The fact that we discover more about ourselves, the music and the possibilities each week, creates a unique bond filled with love, laughter, memories…and more.

Additionally, I have the joy of singing with three wonderfully passionate ladies in Playlist! When we come together to rehearse or perform it’s always a new experience.

Then there are the times when I have the privilege of sharing the intimate details of clients lives when I’m asked to write a song for a loved one. Their appreciation when I connect their hearts in such a unique way is a blessing beyond mere words.

Finally, watching my kids perform everything from Opera to Hard Rock or singing along with the radio – just the fact that they have each found ways to share music with the world is something that every mom and performer can appreciate.

I’m thankful that I grew up amongst a family whose faith and joy of singing created a foundation that has lasted over 50 years…but who’s counting :) !

To my parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings, classmates, fellow thespians, and Sweet Adelines…thank you all from the bottom of my heart. And to my husband who supports and encourages my endeavors in performing and teaching music – I love you.

May the music fill your days!

Love,
Kira

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude Day 10 – Reading

Reading has been one of my favorite pastimes for as long as I can remember. Books have served as friends, educators, mentors, and inspiration. They have taken me on vacations, and provided opportunities for laughter or tears.  Additionally, these same books have been there when I’ve needed to take a break and just relax.

I don’t spend as much time reading books as I used too. Now more time is given to articles and stories while researching information on the internet.

The truth is I can get lost in books, and days would go by with little more than a vague awareness of the passage of time if I were totally left alone. In fact, I spent one summer working at the local library while I was in elementary school  just to have the opportunity to be around the wealth of knowledge, information and adventure that graced those shelves.

I will admit that while I have the opportunity to read books on the computer – it isn’t as satisfying as sitting down in a comfortable chair and feeling that book in my hands, smelling the paper and listening to the pages as they turn providing a tangible feedback loop of my progress through the story or text.

The worlds that open up when I read – no matter the source – keep me connected with myself and others…so today…I’m grateful for the ability to read. And I’m thankful that my parents and teachers passed on their love of reading helping me believe in the possibilities that surrounded this new and exciting undertaking.

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude 9 – Opportunity

Today I am grateful for opportunity. The opportunity to try something new and just be present with the experience.

I have the opportunity to make mistakes – to fall flat on my face, get up and try again. I even have the choice to listen to “the committee” and worry about what “they” will say, think or do OR know that the truth lies between God and I and that’s a good thing!

Ultimately I am blessed with the opportunity to learn, grow and experience so much in life. May you all take chances, see choices and create change in your life by embracing of the opportunities that come your way!

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude – Day 7 Love

Serendipity plays into life when we stay in the moment.

Today I am grateful for love, the caring of family and friends both near and far. The love of a God who is all present and all knowing and loves me unconditionally.

And tonight my prayers go out to the young family of Noah Biorkman in Tennessee. While his CarePage has the same information it also requires a log-in. It’s times like these that this poem is so fitting.

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord, “You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there have only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied, “The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand, is when I carried you.” ~ by Mary Stevenson

May you be held in the palm of His hand – today and always!

Kira

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude – Day 4

I wear a ring that says “Everything is possible when you have faith”. And yes – sometimes I wear it to remind myself :)

The saying is true. Who know what we could accomplish if we would release the negative self-talk, that committee that sits on the shoulder and says, who are you to imagine that?

There is a reason that you can’t turn around without seeing some kind of motivational saying about never giving up, always believing, having faith.

Last night a part of me was wondering what was the point of this self-imposed idea of 50+ days writing and sharing about something to be grateful for. Isn’t it just one more voice that keeps saying “the same thing”? And then I heard that little voice repeating “whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

And suddenly I understood in my mind what my heart had told me long before – these ARE the thoughts that will serve us, they are profitable for the body, mind and spirit.

Our thoughts do create our reality so…today I am most grateful for the simple suggestion of doing this gratitude “excercise”.

Who knows what will happen by the New Year!

Join me, won’t you, in seeing what you can accomplish with just a little faith!

In Harmony,
Kira

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude – Day 3

It’s the third day and I find and interesting dichotomy playing in my mind.

Today is Veteran’s Day so we remember those that have served our country in times of peace and war. As a former Marine I was blessed to have never been in any conflict…but many of my friends were not so fortunate.

Now the flip-side is that it’s “Day 3″ which reminded me of the freedom as a gift of personal sacrifice by one man and on the third day He returned and confirmed the fact that death had no power over Him. Christ came and set an example of peace. He preached a gospel of peace and love for our fellow man. The “law” that advocated a time for war was prior to his birth. I wonder what it will take for mankind to embrace the grace that has been imparted.

I am most grateful for the grace. It is because of that love, the mercy of a God who knows that I have one heck of an ego and sometimes get very full of myself – and still loves me while helping me to see the truth that I can close my eyes and night and rest. I would have a hard time sleeping at night otherwise.

There’s an incredible freedom in that knowledge – and I’m grateful for that too!

What is it that you’re grateful for today?

Kira

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Gratitude – Day 1

An “Attitude of Gratitude” – an overused term and an underused action. Even by myself. Recognizing that a prayerful minded state, one of gratitude, is so powerful – and after being reminded by a friend on FaceBook…I’ve embarked on a short term journey.

For the remaining days in 2009 I will affirm reasons for gratitude starting with three great kids. Ben, Triss and Daniel are three of the most wonderful humans I’ve had the pleasure to know.

Each is unique in their philosophical outlook on life as well as their interests. They have their similarities including music, sports and the well being of humanity yet you might find one listening or performing heavy rock, another opera or another country. I am grateful for their kindness, their caring and their honesty.

I’m blessed to have three of the best kids in the world…thanks guys.

Love,
     Mom

PS If you’d like to join me in this feel free to add your reasons for gratitude in the comments section!

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Teacher or Teller

I just love it when I get hit upside the head with something that is so screamingly obvious it pushes my buttons 7 ways from Sunday.

OK maybe that’s going a bit overboard with the metaphor but you get the point.

In a recent discussion, someone told me that two teachers in a relationship with each other weren’t necessarily a good match because they were always “telling each other what/how to do___”…because that is how teachers teach.

The simple fact that it DID upset me spoke volumes.

As I thought about it I realized that the best teachers guide their students on a journey of self-discovery. They understand their subject and students so well that they can formulate questions to encourage them to find their own answers. While there are times that some details may be necessary to provide a foundation…that foundation is best laid when the subject is eager for knowledge.

Those teachers that feel pressed to deliver, unqualified or limited in their scope of knowledge may resort to an answer that includes some form of “that’s the way it is”.

Or there is the parental fall back of – “here let me do it for you”, because it’s faster and simpler in our push button world.

I’ve done both in my time. And I can recall the frustration…and guilt, when as a young parent or teacher – I would say or do these things because I felt a lack of choices.

Most often it would be with something that either came naturally to me and I didn’t know how I knew something or some time when I had neglected to plan my time well and everyone paid for my shortsightedness.

On the other hand, I’ve worked as a vocal and speech coach with adults who struggle with presenting themselves, speaking up or performing and seen the results when a well meaning but unskilled music teacher (stuck with being a choir teacher in addition to their regular classroom duties) or parent who told the child to “just mouth it” or “we just need you to sing more softly —- all the time” and that child grew up believing they “couldn’t or shouldn’t” sing or speak out.

I have been fortunate to be surrounded by people who loved what they did, my parents who read to me or let me listen for hours on end to talking books. Music teachers within and without my family who loved to sing as well as teach. I even remember in college when I solidified my love for history. There is little doubt that it was tied to my Western Civ Professor who, for 12 weeks, one short semester, spoke of places and times past from a personal relationship. She had traveled all over Europe and her eyes would light up when she talked about the Parthenon or the Coliseum. It’s been over 30 years and while I admit I don’t remember her name, I remember her passion and love of the subject.

I believe it is the same thing with children. When we share our love of reading, music, math, science, nature…whatever the subject NOT because we want them to love it but just because it flows out of our own love for it – they will pick up on it. We’re not telling them they have to learn something – we’re sharing with them our own enthusiasm. There is no need to force them…because we really love what we’re doing.

So the next time you want to help someone learn a concept, skill or craft, if it becomes a struggle – take a moment and ask yourself these questions:

  1. Do I love what I’m talking about?
  2. Am I trying to “tell” them what to do?
  3. Do I feel like I have enough tools in my tool bag that I can help them discover their own answers?
  4. Am I unattached to their results?

If you answered no to any of these – consider asking for outside help. And let me know how it goes.

In the meantime, thank someone today that has inspired you, share a smile with someone you love and find something to laugh about :) it’ll keep you young at heart.

Love,
Kira

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

A Journey to Artistry

“A singer’s work is never done.” That is the first thing that comes to mind when discussing the varying levels of proficiency in a singer who participates in any type of ensemble work. While much of this applies to all singers – it is specifically targeted for Sweet Adelines, female singers performing in the barbershop style of 4-part harmony.

We must begin with the understanding that the instrument itself is dynamic. The human voice is always changing and affected by a number of items that, in and of themselves, are also dynamic. These include such factors as:

  • Overall health
  • Age
  • Emotions
  • Environment
  • The performing ensemble (the ability to interact, connect with and trust the other performers and audience)
  • Innate skills (God given – may not know how or why they can do something)
  • Acquired skills (through practice and education)

This constant dynamic state is the single most noticeable attribute that wears any singer down. Our expectation is that that once we get a handle on a particular skill we can move on. We are finished with “that” and we don’t want to work on “it” any more.

Nowhere is this dynamic change more evidenced than in the breathing skills. Yet, each successive skill is built with an ever-increasing awareness of the breath, which connects us to our bodies, our sound, our music and our soul.

From Novice to Expert, I believe a singer tends to fall within one OR MORE of the “Four Stages of Competency”. The singer may move backward or forward based upon what is going on in their lives. For example, a woman during pregnancy may find that breathing while singing takes on a completely new dimension, even though she had reached the point in her singing career where it required little thought due to her physical exercise routine during the “non-pregnant” state. Another example is seen in the process of recovering after any kind of vocal distress. This requires patience that the singer may or may not willingly accept.

Moreover, the idea that just because I KNOW how something is to be done, I can immediately integrate it has tripped more potential adult singers than any single perceived obstacle. The ability to deliver a performance that captivates an audience takes time and practice. As Aristotle said, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit.” Therefore, contrary to the popular saying “practice makes perfect” any accomplished artist or sports aficionado knows that practice makes permanent, so the simple fact is, perfect practice creates a perfect performance.

Being one to have a firsthand relationship with the saying, “God grant me patience, but hurry”, it has taken years to find that place where “now” is filled with “joy”. I have fought with myself to own the concept that the joy is in the journey, not the destination. As singers, we will always be in a state of growth or decay – we choose. As Kim Hulbert once pointed out, a state of perfection is only achieved when you are six feet under.

So let us examine the necessary skills along with the four stages and their interaction. It is the one who masters the skills and acquires the gift to perform in the “now” of sharing their performance with their audience, that one finds an artist who uses their instrument as their brush and the universe as their canvas.

7 Skill Areas

Starting with the specific skill areas, the following list is a short version of an ensemble singer’s ideal skill areas.

  1. Posture
    1. Total connection from head to toe with fluid, flexible freedom
  2. Breath
    1. As the foundation for any sound, the breath carries with it the ability to deliver the sound. This sound will ride on a column of air that is free from tension both on the inhalation and exhalation
  3. Pitch Accuracy
    1. The internal sense of “do” and the ability to produce sounds that enhance the ring and spin of the barbershop style of music
  4. Articulation
    1. With a focus on the American English language, singing well-matched vowels and consonants that create a flowing vocal line and allows the listener to understand the story being told
      1. A visual chart as well as audio examples of several diphthongs can be seen / heard at http://www.paulmeier.com/ipa/diphthongs.html
  5. Resonation
    1. The balanced combination of back space and “ping” within the voice creating overtones using the four resonators
      1. Nasopharynx – the nasal passages and sinus cavities
      2. Mouth
      3. Oropharynx – the back of the mouth
      4. Laryngopharynx – the area from the top of the larynx to the back of the mouth
  6. Vocal Energy and Freedom
    1. Awareness and use of the singers “own” voice
    2. Appropriate Physical Tension
    3. Appropriate Emotional Tension
    4. The ability to focus and stay in the moment
    5. The ability to move with and within the music
  7. Artistic Delivery
    1. The moment when the energy is fed and created by the interaction between the audience and the singer. The singer is able to be one with the message in the music and take the listener on a journey. During this journey, the listener is able to suspend belief being transported to another place and time.

And before we continue, I’d like to point out that it is true that we have all had the opportunity to hear one or more soul moving performances where at least one of the first 5 skill areas were demonstrated with something less than perfect command. Listening to Joe Cocker singing, With A Little Help From My Friends, the audience is moved both by the message and the messenger. His commitment to the performance is obvious – whether we like the style or not. In “barbershop style harmony”, (among other characteristics) the ringing chords set the music apart. Therefore, the unit approach within the ensemble is critical to creating a musical experience that has a hope of achieving that ultimate Artistic performance so each individual will contribute based on her mastery of each skill.

Unconscious Incompetence

With the overview of the skills behind us we continue on to the first stage of competency called “Unconscious Incompetence.” At this level, a Novice singer neither understands nor knows how to do something beyond singing the words and generally the right notes. Moreover, they are not even aware that they don’t know. In many cases, the Novice or Beginning singer will quickly move OUT of this stage in one or more skill area but still have the majority of skills fall within the stage. For example while many singers begin to get a handle on breathing as to move into stage two or even three, it will be sometime before they understand or even recognize Vocal Freedom. The preconceived idea of what is “good” or what the singer “should” sound like can take time to process. They may not recognize for some time that they are trying to sing in a style that isn’t their true voice (such as imitating another singer that they frequently listen to).

Conscious Incompetence

At the second stage of learning, known as “Conscious Incompetence”, the singer does recognize a specific skill, though she does not understand nor know how to execute it. The Advanced Beginner is seen primarily in this stage. Additionally, singers may even have a limited number of skills beginning to emerge in the third stage of competence (Conscious Competence), yet it is almost a toss of a coin as to their ability to execute any one of them.

The singer at this level may find themselves very frustrated because they know “what”, they may know “why”, but they can’t get a handle on the “how”. The singer as well as the ensemble will do well to encourage further study while AT THE SAME TIME treating themselves and others with TLC. That loving kindness, persistence and patience will help the artist emerge through the periods of doubt and–what sometimes feels like self-loathing. It takes time to create new habits, even longer to break old ones, and any one of the 7 Area Skills can be quite challenging to overcome. Repeating the mantra, “An Obstacle is Simply an Opportunity in Disguise” during this time may be quite helpful.

Conscious Competence

In the third stage known as “Conscious Competence”, the singer understands or knows how to execute a minimum of the first six skills necessary for a wonderful performance. However, demonstrating the skills requires a great deal of focus and concentration. This is where you will find many “good” singers—very proficient indeed—but, they require much presence of mind. We can easily fall into the trap of “good enough” at this stage because we are having fun, the audience enjoys the performance and we probably don’t have to spend a lot of our time outside of rehearsal maintaining this level of competency to varying degrees.

It is during this third stage the singer may have one remaining area that they have yet to relate to. This may be due to either a lack of opportunity to experience it, a belief that it is beyond their capabilities OR a fundamental resistance to allowing it to happen. This is the ability to experience a truly artistic moment of delivery. This experience, more than any other, will encourage the singer to progress and seek to own the final level of competency in all of the skill areas so that they are one with their voice.

Unconscious Competence

The fourth and final level, known as "Unconscious Competence", is achieved when the singer has had so much practice with a skill that it becomes “second nature” and performs easily and effortlessly, purely and unconsciously. The singer may or may not be able teach it to others, depending upon how and when it was learned. Someone considered an “Expert” singer exhibits the first six Skill Areas at this level to a high degree of consistency. Again, the important thing to remember here is that the human instrument is dynamic. Therefore, the Expert singer will revisit all of the skill areas during rehearsal / practice sessions. A singer who really believes that their instrument is a gift from a higher power will continue to practice these skills so that the performance is free of any effort to control the sound thereby allowing them to stay in touch and in tune with their audience.

A 5th Dimension?

Finally, I believe that there is a level beyond “Expert” where the singer is truly an Artist. The Artist exhibits all of the first six skill areas to a high degree and is blessed when they are one with the seventh. This experience is more of the exception than the rule. It is my personal belief that this is often because we are afraid to be laughed at, to make a mistake, yes even to fall on our face. We refuse to risk much – therefore our ability to experience much is elusive. It is important to remove all elements of doubt within any performance. Knowing that we can deliver (Conscious Competence) is only a single element of the Artistry, trusting that we have the ability to deliver (Unconscious Competence) is yet another key. However, it does not stop there. In an ensemble, there are other performers on the stage. This level of Artistry means that everyone trusts each other to deliver. That takes time, preparation and Belief. Or maybe—that’s where it all starts…

May your path include a journey to transcend and experience the magic of that artistic moment. My desire for you is that it will be yours at least once in your life.

In Harmony,

Kira Wagner

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Happiness is a choice that we make every moment of our lives

Over the last week, I had the pleasure of spending time in Anaheim as a volunteer at the Barbershop Harmony Society convention. On Friday, the emcees of the contest were twin brothers with a great sense of humor and…both blind.

As I listened, laughed and watched their banter, I was reminded of my parents (both John and Larry Gassman have a build similar to that of my father – though my apologies to the brothers as they are much younger and very much alive :) .

My parents were very much in love with two very active little girls and both of them blind.

As the music continued over the course of the day, I found myself reflecting on our time together and many of the lessons they taught me through their daily living. Moreover, even though they have passed on, there are insights that are reinforced every day.

Over the next few weeks, I will be sharing some 50 lessons that I have learned from either them at the time, or as a result of hind-sight.

Starting with something close to home – Happiness is a choice that we make every moment of our lives.
My parents had plenty of opportunity for choices..

My (Russian) mother was born in Shanghai and spent much of her youth in a convent while both of her parents worked. Actually, when she was born, my grandmother cut off her own braid and would leave my mother in her crib with the braid and a bottle. The doctors couldn’t make up their mind if my mother was smart enough to be educated since one would come through and say put her in school, and then the next would say that her blindness affected her intelligence and it was a waste of time. In the 40’s their family escaped on a refugee ship to the Philippians and finally landing in California.

On the other hand, my father was born in Oklahoma and enjoyed sports and looked to the possibilities of serving in the Marines until he had a stroke at the age of 17, which resulted in a severe loss of sight. The endless search for answers and cures took their toll on my grandparents and yet – their faith that the answer was there somewhere kept them going. Over time, they too moved to California.

With their vision challenges as well as my father’s ongoing health issues associated with the brain tumor, my parents still took the time to show each other and us how they cared very deeply for each other. I know there were times when it was hard for them with hospital appointments, young children and so many other distractions that accompany raising a family. However, they still had their faith in God, love for life and a belief in the possibilities. They made a choice to be happy and make the most of every moment they had together. They made a choice to give my sister and I the same opportunity. They would fill our home with friends and relatives, laughter, love and music until the day they died.

I think it was a pretty good lesson on how to live and how to choose to be happy.

Stay tuned for the second installment!

In Harmony,
Kira Wagner

  • Share/Bookmark

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!